a polaroid of your subconscious

i put the spoke on my wheel of fortune
to trip while blaming others
to stall my true calling
to stop me from thanking, accepting, then letting go
and to balance my yin yang, well
that'd be asking just too much

...

you: the emperor turned magician
will evolve into a hermit
with a ladden carriage
to balance the force
of mind and beast

seasons greetings

 boring-
i've decided i'm gonna be proper boring
i know i've said this before
broken too many promises
lips weren't sealed, after all
loose lips winning battleships
 boring-
wish i'd trade bodies
fake tits, having a grip,
gobbing up salads, virgin piña coladas
 boring-
when your party has a christmas spirit
that means everyone's sober, innit
and i'm here wishing it was over, dearest
 boring-
spilling drinks from grinding too hard
spilling truths from drinking just enough
i'de really love it if everyone would just shut up
except i hate silence
 boring-

i want to fuck you like a dog

daddy
please daddy
take me home and tie me to your bed
fuck me all night and i'll sleep all day
i'll be a pretty whore in a skin tight dress
please daddy please
i touched myself six times today
had five shots of rum
four cans of beer
three cigarettes
two spankings

please
one more
i'll be good pretty please
daddy daddy please
i want to be punished for being alive
for being a flirt a jezebel
hurt me daddy
spit on me
make me beg
i need to forget
touched myself all day today
but i never stop aching
i'm nothing anymore
just a little slut
saying give me
      give me
give me
i need it so bad daddy
please hurt me
take me as you please
fill me up until i'm yours
share me with everyone
fuck all my holes
use me use me abuse me
spoil me
ruin me
please daddy
pretty please
i don't wanna have to ask for it
it's what i'm for

http://vocaroo.com/i/s1JL9cYhby9J

two black cadillacs, two black cadillacs

i'm always making excuses as i go
scurrying through the streets
i'm late, i'm leaving, i didn't do it
                                  all become
i was helping a blind dog cross the street
i have to go deliver this basket across the woods
i went on a quest to learn the hidden arts and failed

i do all my own stunts:
jumping over a pile of all the unnecessary lies
or through loopholes on fire, tiptoeing on the tightrope
digging up my grave and burying myself alive

get in line to throw your handful of dirt

if i'm writing, then i'd rather be empty

all the boys wanna fix me
     but i'm too broken
              like a record
                 too broken
              like a record
                 too broken
i skip,
          i skip,
                    i skip
                            all your favourite tracks


(i'll have to leave again,
because the hardest part is staying
and i've got an expiration date,
i'm like a ticking bomb
want to be torn open
just to put myself back again)

sickness:

ive been quoting the same phrases for over a decade to cover up the fact ive got nothing to say. told the same story a thousand times, so much its not even real, its prefabricated, its an overproducted comercial that wont sell you a thing. i backed myself into an alley; im confortable here, safe even. fitting all of us into boxes so we wont ever have to question anything. "a copy of a copy of a copy" all i am is quotes. filling the empty space selling lies and trading thruths and i havent heard a word you were saying, im so gone trying to forget we all exist. nothing new under the sun but it is what it is.

(stop trying to undestand me

i dont undestand myself)